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Mary Layden's Library

A Bad Hare day ©


The tortoise and the hare ran the legendary race

The hare was sure he'd win so he slowed down his pace

when the tortoise beat him the hare tut-tutted

he was well and truly gutted

the tortoise was tired after the race

but the hare had not a hair out of place


Haw Maw ©

Haw Maw, can I get a packet of crisps?

Maw, can I get a bag of chips?

can I buy something from the van?

maybe an ice-cream cone or a can!

Haw Maw, can I get a McDonalds for my dinner?

They say the happy meal is a winner.

you always get a pack of toys

some for girls and some for boys.

Will you shut up and give it a rest!

Sometimes you can be a right wee pest.





A Lighter New Year ©

Christmas is over for another year

we were all filled with festive cheer

up to our eyes in mincemeat pies

shortbread, cake and chocolate too

now we are all very fu'

wine, whisky, vodka, sherry

by jove we were merry

ha ha ha, and ho ho ho

we were always on the go

now its time to slim again

before we are in too much pain

back to the weightwatchers we must go

ha ha ha, and ho ho ho






A W8 problem ©


I want to have a figure

but not a figure 8

I know I'm good at losing pounds

in money, not in weight

where did all this fat come from?

perhaps from what I ate

could it be the ice-cream and sweets?

or maybe the biscuits and cake.


from now on its





hopefully this will do the trick

I can only




What is love? ©

On the battlefield a soldier lies

hurt, and distressed, He cries

his comrade hugs him to give him a heat

then he helps hm up on his feet

This is love!


During a disaster people die

some are injured, children cry

help is given in different ways

from people who live in other countries

This is love!

Children and adults get abused

some are very badly bruised

shelter for them is always there

because a lot of people care

there's somewhere warm

and they're free from harm

This is love!

some animals are badly treated

starved, beaten up, and neglected

some get help when it's least expected

This is love!


Undecided ©

I am sitting here nice and quiet

wondering about this blooming diet

should I just eat what I like?

and tell the nurse to take a hike

All the food I like so much

are all the things I shouldn't touch

Chocolates and Ice-cream, biscuits and sweets

plus all the tasty snacks and treats

I'm told to drink water to make me fu'

the trouble is I'm always looking for a loo

if I drink too much and overeat

I won't be able to see my feet

My blood pressure will rise when I'm a bigger size

I will be so stout I won't want to go out

I won't have the energy to get dressed

I will sit in my house and feel depressed

My friend will get bored with me and then

I will be back on my own again

This isn't the life for me, I know

so back to the weight classes I will go.




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